dave
something witty goes here
post rank lord of the gimps
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registered Nov 2001
location portslade, UK
posts 4023
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level 47
member id 1
HP 487 / 1170
MP 1341 / 30200
experience 83%
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 post #7 :: 3rd April 2007 at 01:25 PM
RIMMER: Lister, if you were a love celibate like me you wouldn't have these problems.
LISTER: Come on, Rimmer, the only reason you knocked around with those prats from the Love Celibacy Society was you could never get a date.
RIMMER: No, it wasn't. I happen to agree with their philosophy that love is a sickness that holds back your career and makes you want to spend all your money.
LISTER: You could never get a date because you let your mum buy all your casual clothes.
RIMMER: There is nothing wrong with my casual clothes.
LISTER: Oh, come on, Rimmer, your trousers were so short, when you crossed your legs, you could see your knees.
RIMMER: What about Yvonne MacGruder? That was a date.
Lister: She'd been hit on the head by a winch. She had a concussion.
RIMMER: That's got nothing to do with it. She was crazy about me.
LISTER: Oh, yeah? She kept calling you "Norman."
RIMMER: She still went to bed with me.
LISTER: Yeah, because she had wonky vision and she thought you were somebody else.
RIMMER: Serves her right for being concussed, doesn't it?
LISTER: Rimmer! You don't know what love is.
RIMMER: Yes, I do. Love is a device invented by bank managers to make us overdrawn.
LISTER: Rimmer... Love is what makes us different from animals.
RIMMER: No, Lister, what makes us different from animals is we don't use our tongues to clean our own genitals.
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